Obituary of Rose M. Matina (Cigno)
Rose M. (Cigno) Matina
Webster - On December 10, 2017, at age 90 in the comfort of her home, peacefully entered eternal life after 14 months facing cancer with grace and dignity.
Survived by her husband of 65 years, I. Donald; children, Donna (William) Fierstein, Richard (Judy), Jean (David) Torrens, John (Anne Marie); grandchildren, Joe (Corinne), Ally, Rob, Derek; sister, Olga; countless extended family members. Predeceased by her parents, Sam and Sarah; siblings, Mary, Andy and Vinnie.
Rose devoted her life to her immediate and extended family, long-time friends and to her Catholic faith.
Calling hours Sunday December 17, 1-5PM at the Falvo Funeral Home, 1295 Fairport Nine Mile Point Rd. (Webster Rte. 250). On Monday please meet the family at 10:30AM for the Celebration of her Funeral Mass in St. Paul's Church (783 Hard Rd., Webster). Entombment Holy Sepulchre Cemetery. Rose's wish is in lieu of flowers send donations to Rochester Multiple Sclerosis Center, c/o U of R, 601 Elmwood Ave., P.O. Box 605, Rochester, NY 14642.
Rose Matina
Remembrance by daughter Jean
Presented at Funeral Mass
For those of you that do not know me, I am Rose’s youngest daughter, Jean.
And for all of you that know my mom, I feel confident to say that you would agree that she was one of the sweetest and most generous individuals that you have ever known. Caring about others more than herself, especially those in need.
In looking back at photos, I was reminded how her life was centered around her family - immediate and extended, as well as her long-time, and even her more recent friends.
My mom also had amazing strength, never complaining about her life challenges. Facing each and every difficult situation with grace and dignity. Never saying “Why me?”.
Her positive outlook on life spilled over to others because she always gave us the gift of her smile, even on her most difficult days.
My mom was little in size but big in heart and enormous in strength.
Motherhood
Growing up with such a loving mom meant the world to me. I have so many wonderful memories. The simple things were the best.
Supportive
Coming home from school my mom was always there for us. With a warm smile and hug.
She was so supportive. When we were having a tough day, she knew just how to make it better. For example one time when I was stressed about exams, I came home to my favorite meal… spaghetti & meatballs, even though it was end-of-July with no air-conditioning. Her sweet gesture was so comforting to me.
Fun – Playing Games
Another one of my mom’s sweet gestures, was playing games with us kids after dinner.
She continued this fun with her grandchildren.
And even during her illness, she still enjoyed playing games especially with her visitors.
Fun – Going Downtown
Another very special time for me as a little girl was getting all dressed up to spend the day downtown with my mom and my sister.
We even had matching mother-daughter dresses, which was really cool. She had such a wonderful way of making me feel so special.
Fun – Taking Walks
Another simple pleasure of my mom’s was taking walks.
Out of necessity, walking was her mode of transportation because my folks only had one car.
But it also was a something that she enjoyed and shared with us girls. When we were young she would take us for a “block” walk that turned into over 4 miles… though it did sometimes include an ice cream break at Carvels.
Even during her last couple of months, my mom said that it was really important to her that she continued to walk. And she met this goal right up to the last week. The only tricky thing is that she still wanted to walk really fast as she always did all her life. A number of times when her younger sister was walking with her, Olga said “Ro slow down, I can’t keep up with you!”.
Pride in Her Home
Another wonderful attribute of my mom was that she took great pride in making a nice home for our family.
One of her traditions was rearranging furniture and switching draperies twice a year. We would come home from school and wonderfully our home had a fresh new feel the start of each spring and each fall.
She told me a cute story one time about rearranging furniture… When she was still living home with her mother and siblings, she decided to change around the living room. When her brother Vinnie came home later that evening he did not turn on the lights so not to wake anyone, and sure enough he tripped over furniture that was not there earlier that day. As you could image he was not too happy initially, but later on he did forgive her because she took the extra effort in making their home special.
Cook
My mom was also a very good cook.
She was creative with everyday meals. Always trying new recipes.
She made all her meal as special as possible. Even making simple meatloaf extra special by imprinting a happy face.
Baker
My mom also a wonderful baker.
One of her specialties that she made for years was homemade bread. It was oh so delicious and the smell was so wonderful. Anyone who had her delicious Easter bread would agree.
Teacher
My mom was also a great teacher.
She taught me so many of her special recipes. One of my favorites was learning all her Christmas cookie recipes, baking with her year after year. We would start baking weeks before Christmas, making at least 12 different varieties.
My mom also taught me the enjoyment of entertaining. She showed me many of her techniques to make things a bit fancy like making radishes into rosettes. She also taught me how to treat our guests special, by putting out the food in nice dishes and platters… never just putting the jars on the table… that was not good enough for her special guests.
Entertainer
As you may have noticed from the slideshow, so many of the photos are of my mom throwing our big family parties and gathering for her friends. This was one of her many ways to give her love to all those who she cared about.
She would take days to prepare the house and make tons of delicious food. She made each gathering special with all of her special touches.
For many of the celebrations, she made cakes from scratch and then designed them into fancy creations such as… doll cake with big fancy dresses, a sail boat, a dog, a carousel, and a couple different versions of the Easter Bonnie.
Even while she was ill, she still was taking care of everyone. Pretty much every time someone was visiting, my mom would say "we need to get the food out”. Even if she did not eat much herself, she would push the platters toward her guests and say “have some, have some”.
The ladies that took care of my mom at home also learned the art of entertaining like my mom. They learned to put out a spread including her favorite sides… the traditional black olives, marinated artichokes, and roasted red pepper… and of course served nicely in bowls and serving platters. Just like my mom did… treating her guests special.
Board Member
Another way that my mom took care of others, was she was a board member of her senior club for decades. Always making sure everything was just nice for her friends.
Devotion to Her Faith
Besides my mom’s devotion to all of you who are part of her life, her other main devotion was to her faith.
Her daily routine her entire adult life was… in the quiet of the morning before anyone else was awake, she prayed the rosary and for those that needed special support from God she did novenas prayers. Any of you who she knew that had hardships, I am confident to say that you received this series of prayers from her. She most likely did not tell you because it was her secret gift to you.
As for her commitment to church, this was very special. She did not go just to fulfill a requirement, but instead went because she truly felt the love and peace that came from going to mass.
Even during her illness, she always wanted to go to church. Though she was fatigued and her eyes were closed many times during mass, Father Paul told me that she always opened her eyes when he came to give her communion.
And she was so darn adorable when she had moments of confusion due to changes in meds… she became fixated on church. No matter if it was in the middle of the night, she would insist that we needed to take her… saying “let’s go, let’s go”. No one was going to let her miss mass! It was that important to her.
Two weeks before she went to heaven, I had the privilege to take her to church for her last time. She opened her eyes 5 different times during the mass, scanning across the entire church. She definitely was soaking it all in, gaining so much.
Phrases
On a lighter note, I like to share with you some of my mom’s phrases.
When we were kids, she so many times said “We’ll see”. This was her way of saying “no” without bursting our bubble immediately. I chuckled one day recently when I heard her say “We’ll see” to one of her aides when she was being encourage her to eat something later that day.
Another one of my mom’s favorite words was “Junky”. She was not a materialist person at all, but if something in her home started looking worn, this was her warning to my dad that it was time to replace it because it was important to her to have a well-kept home.
So are you ready for her swear words? “Oh brother” and just recently she said “Phooey”. That is as harsh as she got her entire life.
And a phrase that most of you most likely had heard over the years when asked how she was doing was “I’m fine, I’m fine. How are you? Or how is such & such?”. This was because she did not want the focus on her, but instead wanted to hear about others and how they were doing. Always caring about everyone else.
And just 2 years ago before her illness, out of the blue, she said “90 is good enough”. She said that she lived a full life and was ready for whenever God wanted her. Boy, she really called it, didn’t she?
Simple Pleasures
To sum it all up, my mom enjoyed simple pleasures her whole life such as… making our house a home… going to mass… taking walks… playing games… entertaining.
And most of all spending time with all of you who she truly loved… as a devoted wife, mother, grandmother, sister, aunt, and friend. Her loved shined bright through her big smiles when she was with those who she loved.
During her last couple of months, she so enjoyed seeing the photos of so many of you. Reminiscing what a wonderful life she had because of all the love that surrounded her all her 90 years.
Her Legacy
Let me end by saying that I believe that my mom Rose’s legacy is her unconditional love and devotion to her family, her friends, and her faith. Her life was centered on giving to others.
My mom Rose made such a positive impact on our little world here. I truly feel that she is shining positive energy down on us right now.
How lucky we are to have had her in of our lives.
Jean Torrens, daughter
(presented at funeral mass)
1920’s - 2017
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